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Keeping Myself and the Blog Together (Sort Of)

  May 6

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I think we all have those periods in our lives where we look back and think, “How did I do that?”

I think I am in the midst of one of those right now, like if I stop long enough to actually think about what’s going on, I might just start hysterically crying so instead I just keep really busy.

I really did envision something better for the first few weeks of the twins’ life. I didn’t want them to have to spend two weeks in the NICU or two weeks with their parents stressed as all get out while we tried to find a new place to live and move clear across the country with only 17 days of notice.

Warming Bottles at a Rest Stop!
Warming Bottles at a Rest Stop!

Not only that but I’m still recovering from my c-section and getting used to being a new mom and still trying to work since Budget Blonde and all the writing jobs it has helped me secure is our primary income. So, there’s been a lot of pressure for me to keep things afloat. Sure, we have medical school loans from the hubs but anyone who knows me understands that I’m trying to rely on them as little as possible.

Of course, during my three day drive from Louisiana to New Jersey with the 6 week old twins in the car, I start having technical issues with the blog – and when there’s technical issues, income drops. It’s nothing you can see from the outside while reading this post, but definitely something that needed to be addressed immediately. Except that I couldn’t because I was stuck in a car for three days with only my iPhone…and then we have unpacking to do…

When we got to New Jersey, the hubs had to go to work pretty much immediately and of course, his first day gone is the day that my daughter decides to cry nonstop for hours with a smattering of my son crying in between just to keep things interesting. Luckily my aunt was here with me and another sweet friend dropped in to help otherwise I think I might have found a big rock to go hide under and not come out.

I try to be super positive on this blog all the time, but this is real life and it is what it is. I know that things will get better, that I’ll get used to New Jersey, that I’ll find a kitchen table for some awesome price somewhere, and that I’ll somehow find the time to actually keep working at this blogging job that I busted my butt to create.

When I feel like I’m on the brink of tears, when I wonder why I wanted to work from home so badly when it seems nearly impossible, I just remind myself that I have two healthy babies, a really good and solid marriage, and a pretty extreme work ethic to get us through these tough points.

I’m so appreciative of everyone who has helped me during the past six weeks including my parents and in laws who fed us when we couldn’t even think about what to cook, Michelle from Making Sense of Cents who checked my e-mail for me for the entire six weeks, and the 18+ bloggers who took the time to send me guest posts when I had zero time to create my own content.

I still haven’t properly thanked everyone. Hell, I still haven’t finished my thank you notes from my baby shower months ago (which is pretty much a felony in the deep south). And, today was probably the first time I’ve remembered to wash my hair in…um, a while. I suppose it’s a beautiful thing in all it’s madness. Do you think I’ll look back and miss it?

This about sums up my feelings too.

42 responses to “Keeping Myself and the Blog Together (Sort Of)

  1. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

    The good news: You’re all healthy and safe. And now that you’re in a permanent place, you can start getting things back on track. PLEASE let me know what I can do to help!

  2. Sending hugs, Cat! If anyone can do this, you can!

  3. Holy Cow, that’s a lot of change in a very short period of time! Just think, now you have time to settle in, the babies are out of ICU and at home which is a huge stress reliever, though it does put a little bit more on your personally at home. You’ll make it work. And your aunt and friend can give you a breather every once and a while to go hide under your rock if need be.

    My Mom helps all my cousins and friends when they have babies. She doesn’t go over to visit… she goes over to look after the little ones while the new moms get to nap, or shower, or whatever needs to be done. It’s probably the best gift she gives them – 15 minutes to themselves. I’d offer her services if she didn’t live far away 😉

  4. Real life sounds tough but it sounds like you’ve got what it takes to fight through it. Congratulations on everything! I wish I could have known that you needed guest posts to keep things going as I would have loved to help. Feel free to reach out if you need anything going forward (content or otherwise) and congrats again 🙂

  5. In a few years you’ll look back and laugh about the time you moved across the country with newborn twins!

  6. You are one strong woman! We are moving at the beginning of next month and I can’t imagine only having 17 days notice! You are AWESOME! Stay strong you will get through this!!

  7. I think you will look back and laugh at how crazy things were…just not soon enough from today’s perspective. So much change in such a short time makes you a more resilient person even if it doesn’t seem like that way now.

  8. I have been thinking about you the last few weeks and wondering how you’re doing. Even though you may feel overwhelmed and out of control, you’re still a total rockstar in my book! ps. Check out Bob’s Discount Furniture

  9. You are doing a really great job of keeping it all together! Now that you are in your new home, hopefully things will calm down a little bit for you. Sounds like you have a good support system in your family, friends and husband. Don’t forget to rely on them sometimes, you can’t do everything by yourself 🙂

  10. An extreme work ethic is right; I admire you so much Cat. I have no idea how you do it, but I hope you get a chance to rest soon! Unpacking is such a pain, but I’m sure you guys will be settled in within a few weeks. It’s all uphill from here!

  11. Woah, I can’t even imagine! Good for you for just surviving!

    Also – NJ is awesome despite everyone else in the country making fun of it! And if you’re up near the NYC end, we have a great group of bloggers that meet up pretty regularly. When (if) life settles down, you’re always welcome to join us!

    Good luck adjusting! I’m sure with your awesome attitude and work ethic, you guys’ll make it just fine. And you’ll feel indestructible by the end of this season of life.

  12. You’re amazing.

    If you need anything else that I might be able to help with let me know!

  13. I honestly have no idea how you kept it together long enough to write this post. Seriously, I only had one son, no c-section, paid maternity leave and no move and I seriously barely showered for 6 weeks straight. Every time I had to open the door, I swear I had my boobs hanging out all over the place. I am not sure if you will look back and miss these days, but I am sure that you will look back and feel very proud, as you should, of all that you have accomplished. Hope you find the table and utensils by Friday! Lots of FB food coming your way!

  14. You are doing great, and you’re right—one day you will miss it 🙂 Twins are an amazing blessing, but those early months are also very hard. There’s just no way around that. Be kind and gentle with yourself. You’ve been through a lot in the last six weeks and it takes to adjust to all of these things (babies, NICU, move, new job, new town)—let alone all of them at once! Hang in there and don’t put too much pressure on yourself to do everything at once.

  15. You’re doing great. The first four months are the hardest and you probably won’t remember a lot of it. Don’t be too hard on yourself and if you’re stressed, just remember, this too shall pass. {Hugs}

  16. I can’t imagine just how crazy things must be for you. I don’t know if this offers any reassurance, but we will all still be here when you are able to fall into a normal (if at all possible) routine!

  17. If you need anything at all – seriously anything – email me. I feel like I can completely relate to you. While I didn’t have twins I did have my two daughters close together. And those first couple years of life are tough. A lot tougher than you think they will be. My kids are now 4 and 5 and there are still times when I get to the point where I feel like I’m going to have to hide behind a rock (or rip my hair out).

    I’ve got a lot of respect for you though. Working from home with kids is really, really hard. It’s nice to have flexibility but when the kids get a little older you might need to send them to the babysitter every so often so that you can get work done. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Remember you are only one person and we all need help every now and then.

    (Hugs!)

    1. I echo Alexa. Ours are pretty close, but we only had them one at a time. And that was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I can’t imagine upending and moving right after the nicu on top of all you do for work WITH twins! The good news is that it does get slightly less crazy, but that doesn’t help at all right now. If there is anything I can do to help, don’t hesitate to ask!

  18. First off, that pic at the bottom is just plain awesome! 🙂 Secondly, you’ve had a ton of big changes in a short amount of time and think you’re doing great and everyone is healthy. As others have said, please seriously let me know if there is anything I can do – I’d be more than happy to help.

  19. This makes me feel like a dog with a tail in-between its legs! I thought my burnout was rough but you are a superstar! Glad to have you on the East Coast though and if you want to venture into NYC in a few weeks/months there are a bunch of bloggers who would love to meet up and show you around. 🙂

  20. *Big Hug!*

    The plus side of it all is that you are getting all of your big sweeping life changes for the next 5-10 years out of the way in one big swoop. So after you get this worked out, it’s going to be smooth sailing for a while. In the meantime, keep your chin up, and reach out when you need help.

  21. You only have to remember that you have a beautiful family and people to support you. Everything else will get back in line eventually. Keep up the hustle Cat!

  22. Wow, you are going through so much, and I admire you for it. I don’t think you’ll necessarily miss this time, but will look back with fond memories and confidence knowing you got through it. The blogging community is here for you! Let us know what you need.

  23. Congratulations on holding it together through a lot of stress, Cat. The good news is that things should settle down a bit from here? (hopeully). They say there are three things you should never do at the same time: move, get married, and start a new job. My wife and I did all three within two weeks of each other. It was SUPER stressful, but once it was all over and we settled in, we breathed a HUGE sigh of relief. 🙂

  24. WOW. Nothing to say but “congrats for making it this far, the worst is probably over.” Amazing that you got through all this — and it’ll be a funny story one day. Maybe not soon 🙂

  25. You’re doing an AMAZING job of holding things together. I’m not sure if you’ll miss this time when it has passed – but you will look back and feel super proud of all you accomplished and made happen even though the journey was tough. Plus, it will definitely make a good story to laugh about later! 🙂 Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help you out!

  26. Oh my goodness! Sending you hugs and support from afar!

  27. Oh, Cat. You’ve had to deal with so much in a short time. I would be ready to hide under a rock too. You are doing an amazing job and now that you’re finally in New Jersey and in your apartment, things can begin to slow down. It’s okay if you don’t get everything unpacked immediately. Take your time and be with your babies. You will look back and miss this – even if it’s hard to imagine right now. 🙂 If you need anything – let me know. I’m also happy to write a guest post if you still need them. Just give me a holler! Take care, my friend.

  28. Hey Cat, I just came across your blog today! Where in NJ have you moved? I currently reside in NY but will be making the move to northern NJ at the end of the month. I understand how stressful moving can be and I couldn’t even imagine doing it with kids! You should check out Craigslist for furniture and other free things. My boyfriend and I found a beautiful dining room table for $100. Best part is the table is in excellent condition and it’s the exact style I’ve been dreaming about! Good luck on settling in; I think you’ll enjoy NJ 🙂

  29. You are Superwoman Cat! I thought dealing with ONE little baby was challenging…couldn’t imaging taking care of two AND having to move! Hope everything is going smoothly now. Welcome to the Northeast!

  30. Cat, I admire you SO much. As you mentioned in this post, you obviously face struggles and are stressed out, but to the outside, you’re handling this all flawlessly. I’ve been so impressed with all your blogging and the way you handled the entire move. You’ve been put in some crazy situations and I know I would just fall apart. You truly are superwoman. xoxox

  31. You probably won’t miss this stage, but someday you’ll look back be amazed at how you did it all. I can’t imagine how you are pulling it all off, and it does not matter if you house doesn’t get unpacked for 6 mos. I’m wishing you several consecutive hours of sleep.

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